Child Racing

This year marks a full circle of fun as a scout leader. I have now led every year of every level of Girl Scout troops.

If you were to ask me what is my favorite level … I wouldn’t divulge.

I can tell you that my perspective has changed over the years and I’m grateful for my memories. It’s those memories that remind me why I’m a leader. And it’s the repeat patterns that remind me that I think I’m doing it right – at least for the most part. (No one’s perfect.)

I remember leading my teen troop when they were first-year juniors. We met in the building of a local school. I honestly do not recollect any of the meetings that year. However, I have a vivid, vivid memory of the little sister of a member of that troop.

 Every night after our meeting was finished, little Samantha would come up to me with her big eyes and orange hair and offer a challenge.

“Miss Jenny, do you want to race?” She’d ask, those big eyes sparkling.

I’d be in the middle of greeting or updating parents and without hesitation, I’d say, “You’re on!”

At the time, Sam was probably the age my second daughter is today; six or seven.

We’d scamper to the end of the field. Sam’s dad would stand at the other end beside her mom who smiled with a bemused look on her face. “On your mark. Get set. GO!” Mike would yell. And we were off! Her little legs working as hard as they could. Her face etched with determination.

You may wonder if I let the seven-year-old win.

I did not.

In my defense – she WAS really fast!

I raced her for years. And, until she was about 10 or 11, I always won. Each year she’d get faster and faster. Each year, she’d work harder and harder. And, finally one day she beat me.

That’s when I stopped racing her. Losing once is plenty. ;)

In seriousness, the racing was fun. But what I always thought was cooler:  The little sister of a troop member had forged a relationship with me.

To be honest, it touched my heart.

At that point I realized how important it was to find the thing that connects me with each of my troop members. One may like running. The other, music. Whatever it was that we could relate about; that’s where I sought to connect.

As the years progressed, I acquired the little sisters of my (then) “tweens” and they became troop members also. Sam was now a member of my troop. To this day, she certainly is one of my three current favorite teen members. (wink , wink I have only three teen members. I don’t play favorites. I love them all!)

But it always seemed cool that I had a special little bond with Sam, even before she was in our troop.

Fast forward to present. This week at Audrey’s gymnastics class, the younger sister of one of my Brownies gave me a present she had made; a sweet little tulip ornament.

Again, I was touched. I’ve known this little bean for nearly four years and until about a month ago, I could never get her to even talk to me. And, Tuesday she gave me a prize. Again, I was honored.

There is nothing but gratification when you know a sibling who has been watching you with his or her sister for a while, begins to trust you, too. It’s an indication that you’ve been invited (even at the smallest capacity) into their worlds. And that’s an invitation I take with great care.

Being a Girl Scout leader has afforded me the opportunity to become involved not only with the Scouts, but with their families. My involvement with these families makes me a better parent … both now and in the future.

Siblings, parents and girls … all unique and wonderful people who have expanded my world.

I’ve had the enlightenment of knowing people of different faiths, different economic backgrounds, and different viewpoints that I may not have encountered otherwise. Serving as a Girl Scout leader has broadened my life experience.

And … if you think being a leader is just about the girls – you’re wrong. It’s about them and their families. It’s an all-encompassing responsibility … an all-enveloping joy.

Invested Role Model

Girl Scouts offers many benefits to our young ladies. It wasn’t until recently that I realized one incredibly huge benefit. In fact, as a leader, it is a benefit that is NOT afforded to my daughters.

I’ve been a leader for over 12 years. I became a leader before I became a mom. I’ve graduated four girls; three of whom earned their Gold Award and one who received the Young Woman of Distinction Award from our Council. I have three left to graduate; two this year and my final teen scout next year.

Each time they graduate, I’ll be honest, I cry. As we enter their graduating year, I start to silently sulk that I have to say goodbye to yet another of “my girls.” Then I suck it up and dedicate myself to giving those girls their best darn scouting year yet.

I remember the day I became a leader. I hopped my 25 year-old-self into my Toyota RAV4 and headed to council office to volunteer. I sat in the office with a staffer talking about my experiences as a Scout and how I might get involved now. Nearly 45 minutes into the conversation, it dawned on me, “Wait, are you saying I get to lead a troop?” I asked incredulously. I remember her look of confusion. I think she thought we were already on that same page. Me? Well, I thought they wouldn’t let me be a leader. I figured being so young and not a mom myself, that I’d not qualify for something as coveted as Girl Scout leader. I thought I would start off simply helping in a troop from time to time. I was thrilled at the idea of getting my own troop. Driving home I called my mom, my former Girl Scout leader. “Mom! Guess what?! They are going to LET me be a TROOP LEADER!” I squealed. I’m not lying here … I squealed.

The journey has been amazing. Words can’t express what joy and growth have come to me serving my teen troop. It wasn’t until this year, as a mom of nine-year-old and seven-year-old daughters that I finally understood something I’ve been told by my teen troop moms for years.

Yes, being a troop leader takes time. Yes, there is dedication and even sometimes headaches that come with the job. Yes, we are teaching girls skills they don’t often acquire elsewhere. And, yes, we are building girls with courage, confidence and character.

But, guess what?

We are doing something even greater.

As I tote my three kids from soccer to gymnastics to musical theater, it occurs to me. Even when I was a child and had my own activities; there is not one other extra-curricular activity in which I was invested where I had a constant adult; year upon year; invested in me.

That’s not to say that the softball coaches and orchestra teachers weren’t invested in us. It’s to say, they were committed for the season or the school year. It’s to say that if we moved up a rank in choir, we may have a new teacher.  If we achieved select ball, we got a new coach. Those adults may have poured into our lives, but they poured only in the capacity of the game and only for a finite timeframe.

The Scouting organization is not the same.

Often parents ask me to advise them whether they should put their daughter in Scouts or a youth group – wondering if there’s really much of a difference. I’ve never really had the answer … until now.

I still don’t recommend one over another. But, I do offer this as food for thought.

As girls advance through their ranks in Girl Scouts, typically, they keep the same leader, year after year. The same mom gets the opportunity to invest in your daughter as she guides her facilitates a developing skill set and shares in the growth of moral character. That leader gets to see your daughter learn she is capable – better so, that woman will help your daughter see that for herself. Your daughter’s leader has the unique opportunity to know your child so well that she can see when she falters and help you strategize ways to keep her walking the straight path.

And, if that leader is worth her weight in salt, she’s already doing this.

Our daughters won’t get many opportunities to have another woman pour into her life, serve as a role model, and gently guide her in courage, confidence and character outside of the Girl Scout organization. The model is set up so that we provide our daughters the opportunity to have another adult who we trust, speak into her life. So parents, be sure to pick a good leader. Leaders, be sure to be aware of your monumental responsibility.

As a teen scout leader, I’ve loved the opportunity to watch “my” girls grow. As much as those moms have thanked me for investing in their daughters, I’ve thanked them equally for allowing me to be a part of their lives. At an age when girls aren’t always quick to seek Mom for advice, and even quicker to not listen to Mom’s advice: I know my teen scout moms are happy they have an adult they trust to be there to listen. I’m always upfront with my girls that if they tell me something that will hurt them or others I will have to tell their parents. However, I’ve helped kids through some pretty rough things, both physically and socially. I’ve assisted in getting them into colleges (going even as far as calling the college admissions department). I’ve celebrated 16^th birthdays and fretted when they started driving to and from meetings. I’ve laughed, joked, cried and dreamed with them. Mostly, I’ve learned from them.

Ladies, as you consider your daughter’s path in life. I encourage you to think beyond the social parameters of Scouts, and even beyond the skills they will learn. I offer to you that enrolling and keeping your daughter in Scouts yields a far greater investment on her behalf. One that promises to be life-long.